EFTA Conversation: Interpersonal connection with couples

With Alberto Penna

This talk presents the foundational concepts of an integrated couple therapy approach, grounded in Interpersonal Connection. This is a clinical framework that expands therapeutic work beyond verbal exchange and cognitive narratives, to include emotional and bodily levels of communication. We can emphasize that relational suffering is often sustained by disruptions in deep interpersonal attunement, expressed through implicit signals, physiological responses, and emotional patterns that partners may struggle to recognize through words alone.

After outlining the key principles of the approach, the presentation will illustrate three experiential interventions, that function as “access doors” to deeper layers of the couple’s interaction. First, sculptures will be introduced as a non-verbal method to externalize and embody the relational dynamic. By positioning partners in space, sculptures make visible distance, orientation, contact, and emotional posture, allowing both partners and therapists to observe the relationship “in action” rather than only through description. Second, the activation of empathy will be discussed as a process that can be facilitated intentionally in session, helping partners to move from defensive interpretations toward recognition of the other’s internal experience. Finally, the intervention will focus on the clinically crucial capacity to ask for help, explored through attachment and caregiving systems: many couples remain trapped in conflict because vulnerability and need are masked by anger, withdrawal, or control.

Through these activations, the therapeutic setting becomes a space where connection can be restored not only through insight, but through lived emotional experiences that promote safety, co-regulation, and relational change.

Alberto Penna :Psychologist and psychotherapist, teacher at the Mara Selvini Palazzoli School. He co-created, with Laura Fino, the Interpersonal Connection approach, described in the book Al di là delle parole, for couples and family therapy.
He is a leading advocate for male emotions, explored in depth in the book Maschi che piangono poco; he was a speaker on the topic at TEDx Saronno 2025.
He has been trained in sensorimotor therapy and EMDR for traumatic disorders in adults and children. He has extensive experience in child protection, rehabilitation of abusive families and foster care (collaboration with CAM and CbM in Milan).
He provides training, supervision, and coaching to psychosocial teams nationwide